


born to beg for you

by sandyk



Category: Superstore (TV)
Genre: F/M, Infidelity, multiple AUs, one bi jonah
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-27
Updated: 2017-09-27
Packaged: 2019-01-05 23:01:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12199128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandyk/pseuds/sandyk
Summary: Five Amys who would sleep with Jonah before the tornado and one who would only do it after.





	born to beg for you

**Author's Note:**

> not mine, no profit garnered. For the trope bingo spots: transformations, locked in, loss of innocence, spanking, indecent proposal. Title from the National song.

1\. 

Jonah followed the cute shift supervisor and she turned and said her name was Amy. Then she said, "So how does a privileged college boy end up at Cloud 9?"

"I was driving and I wanted a sandwich," Jonah said. 

"Instead you got a job?" Amy leaned against her car. She had a look about her Jonah might call flirting, but they had just met, he wasn't ready to assume anything. 

"Basically," Jonah said. "I'm being spontaneous, transforming my life. Nothing to go back to, only forward, that is the only direction allowed."

"That sounds nuts," Amy said. She was still smiling. "Must be nice to do that. I have a kid and an ex boyfriend who has never once consistently sent child support."

"Wow, you have a kid?"

"I have an 11 year old kid, and she's great," Amy said. She pushed herself off the car and then her hands were pulling at his jacket. "Also I really liked the stars."

"You're welcome," Jonah said. "What's happening now?"

Amy sighed. "I know I'm bad at this, but I'm hitting on you. I suck at it. It's been two years since I was with anyone so I'm probably doing this wrong."

"You're beautiful, so, um, I think you can't really do this wrong." Jonah reached for her waist. She had this fantastic butt, too, he'd seen it when she'd walked away. 

She kissed him and he kissed her and he loved the softness of her lips, the strength in her grasp as she pulled him closer. She said, "We should have sex in the back of my car." She looked down and then said, "I am obviously really good at this. Super good. That was classy."

"It's fine. Okay," Jonah said. "Or, um, I have a hotel room."

"You just randomly have a hotel room," Amy said.

"I said I was driving and I wanted a sandwich. Once I started, I used my lunch break to get a hotel. Before I get an apartment. I'm moving here, I think," Jonah said.

"That's crazy," Amy said. "And I mean exactly, like, that seems like a sign of mental illness."

"It's actually a sign of getting over mental illness," Jonah said. "Really."

"Okay," Amy said. "You drive there, I'll follow."

"I won't, I will not judge you if you are not there when I get there." Jonah felt that was important to add. 

He was surprised when she pulled in right next to him. He let her into his mildly okay hotel room. 

"This is actually more like a motel," Amy said. She sat down on the bed that didn't have most of Jonah's worldly possessions on it. She took off her shoes and socks and jacket. 

"Yeah, I think it is a motel. It seems like a pretty fine distinction," Jonah said. He sat down next to her and also took off his shoes and socks and jacket. 

"It's not that fine, motels you can drive up to, hotels are more like contained buildings," Amy said. "Let's get to the sex."

"Okay," Jonah said. She was so gorgeous naked. She spread her legs and he gripped her thighs. 

She reached down for his dick and then said, "Do you have a condom? I actually have some in my car."

"Oh, I, okay, I don't. I'm sorry, I should have asked before we got naked."

Amy got up and put on her shirt, pulled on her jeans but didn't button them. "Yes, you should have."

She came back in quickly, and stripped again. She got on the bed and smiled at him. "Hey."

"Hey," he said and took the condom from her hand. 

It was initially pretty awkward. They kissed, and Amy was on top of him, he reached for her breast. She said, "Don't do that thing, I really hate the pinching and the flicking."

"Noted, wasn't planning to," Jonah said. He started kissing her breasts, the nipples, everything with his tongue and not his hands. He ran his hands down her chest to her waist. 

"Okay, okay, good," she said. She took his hand and put it between her legs. He went slow there, too. 

She ran her hands through his hair almost pulling at his hair. "Ouch," he said. "Don't pull."

"Okay," Amy said. "You can pull my hair, though, I like it."

"Yup," Jonah said. "Time for the condom?"

"Yup," Amy said. 

He got it on and said, "Position you prefer?"

"Huh," Amy said. She actually blushed when she said, "I, you know, I like doggy style."

"And I can pull your hair," he said. "Though you might have guessed I'm not the do it hard guy. Unless you want that."

"I don't," Amy said. She laughed and turned on the bed. 

She had the most fantastic ass. He held her ass, and then reached for her hair. One tug, and she was so tight on his dick. He felt her hand touching herself as he fucked her, which was also incredibly hot. She came first, loudly, and he kept going, pulling her tight to his body as he came. 

They both cleaned up in the adequate bathroom. He got back on the bed and watched her getting dressed. "Can we do this again?"

"Oh, yeah," Amy said. "Not for another four days, my daughter's with me until Saturday. Her dad is a total loser but he does love her and she's happier when she sees him."

"Not you, though, you're not happier." 

Amy put on her jacket. "We were going to get married. But a week before, all I could think was I should run away and never come back so I broke up with him. Honestly, I don't think it's made much of a difference in my finances, you know? Just my mental health."

"Totally," Jonah said. "You're amazing."

"Don't have that look on your face when you see me at work tomorrow, I don't want to advertise," Amy said. 

 

2\. 

Amy was the worst. She was a horrible person. She hated change and she was stuck, not just stuck, but in a cycle of being awful and trying to be better. She sighed and walked after Jonah in the parking lot anyway.

"Hey," he said, smiling. "Look, again, I feel like I should apologize, I was probably being a dick about the 100 on the test. I can be really competitive and I shouldn't be. I don't need to be. Being too competitive is probably why I flunked out of business school."

"Yeah, that's weird," Amy said. "Do you have an apartment now? Where were you living when you first started working here?" She didn't care. "I want to see your apartment."

Jonah looked at her and blinked. He said, "You want to see my apartment?"

"I do," she said. She took a deep breath. "So drive, I want to see it."

Jonah nodded. When they were in his car and they'd been driving for about five minutes, Jonah said, "You're married, right?"

"And yet," Amy said. "I was, I am hitting on you."

"You're married," Jonah said.

"Not happily," Amy said. "Which is no excuse. I don't make a habit of it."

"But with me --"

"You're cute," Amy said.

Jonah said, "I should be saying no, but honestly, you're beautiful, too."

Jonah had a boring sparsely furnished apartment. She came inside and went to the kitchen. She opened the refrigerator and grabbed some kind of gross organic soda. She was so thirsty, though, she drank it anyway. Then she went to the bathroom. Jonah had a lot of products. Hair, face, body wash, for shaving. She looked in the cabinets and found a condom.

She came out and sat on his bed. She down next to him. "Look, I know this probably seems odd. I'm awful. I hate change and I've been married for 12 years and I was 19 and so was he, and I don't think either of us ever really grew up except in the way I had to because someone has to pay the rent and get Emma fed. I've actually only had 2 affairs, one was 2 years and one was 6 years ago. I don't know why I say only. I've had two affairs. I have so much I have to do, sometimes I snap. Twice I snap."

"And now me, right?" Jonah pushed her hair behind her ears. "I have that Michael Jackson song stuck in my head, you know, Man in the Mirror." He sang a little, "I'm gonna make a change."

"I feel like we were all so much more innocent then, I mean, Michael Jackson, us. Didn't know," Amy said. "He's not really a role model."

"No, um," Jonah said. "But uh, Rita Moreno. There's a good role model. She faced so many obstacles and look at her now."

"Rita Moreno?" Amy almost laughed. "First Latina actress you could think of?"

"No, but I don't think Jennifer Lopez or Rosie Perez had the gravitas I was going for. Oh, Gina Torres. She's amazing," Jonah said.

"I'm not really into Suits," Amy said. "Or that Firefly show."

"You know what she was great on? Hannibal," Jonah said. "I love that show. I know it's not for everyone."

"Wow, you love weird arty murder shows," Amy said. "I'm so surprised."

"I really like Bryan Fuller's vision, like Wonderfalls and Dead Like Me. Not so into the pie one," Jonah said. "Gina Torres knows a thing about change, I bet. Also, gravitas. Really some substantial gravitas. As an example. A role model, if you want a role model."

"I have lots of role models," Amy said. "But, you're right. I stay the same. I keep doing this and I need to just leave." She pushed him down on the bed and got on top of him. She shifted her hips and ground down, feeling him get hard. "I have condom from your bathroom in my back pocket."

He reached into her back pocket, and smiled at her. It was gentle sex, like just getting to know you, and when she said, "Slow, slow," he slowed down. He came first but he kept touching her, intent on her coming.

When they were all cleaned up, they laid on his bed, shoulder to shoulder. She said, "Right, change. Not the usual thing I hear."

"Well, one out of three isn't statistically significant," Jonah said. "And you started the change, you're the one taking college courses."

"Something Rita Moreno would do," Amy said, smiling.

Jonah already had his phone in his hand. "She didn't go to college, but she definitely advises young people not to forgo education. She has some honorary degrees. Also, an Emmy, Oscar, Grammy and Tony."

"I'd settle for just a BA and happy daughter and a better job than Cloud 9," Amy said.

"That's not settling," Jonah said. "That's a good dream. I would add, happy and free person. Maybe not calling yourself awful."

"Three affairs, Jonah," Amy said.

"Well, maybe, I'll be your last," Jonah said. "Or, if it would help you, I can not have sex with you. Sucks for me, but I would make the sacrifice."

"You're so noble," Amy said. She sat up and held up another condom. "I've got another hour before I need to be home."

"I am not noble at all," Jonah said.

 

3\. 

Jonah had definitely had too much to drink because he was sure he'd said something that indicated he had a crush on Amy. Maybe that was why Dina stomped off angry.

They were locked in, many of them were very drunk. He should find Amy in case she'd heard the thing about he liked her. She was walking on the belt at the register. "Hey," Jonah said. "That seems a little dangerous."

"Whatever," Amy said. "Yes, I heard you secretly lust for you. Don't worry, I'm okay."

"Good to know," Jonah said. He held up his hand. "Do you need some help down from there?"

"Maybe," Amy said. "Getting off the conveyor belt, changing the cycle." She took his hand and started to step down but at least one of them was off balance and Jonah ended up on his butt with Amy sort of between his legs, her elbow jabbing him in the chest. She stood up and said, "Let me help you up, you super strong man, you."

"I think that was your fault," Jonah said. She walked towards the employee bathroom and Jonah followed her. He should probably man up and deal with this whole crush thing.

When they got into the bathroom, Amy immediately started puking in the sink. He automatically pulled her hair back. She stood up and he let go of her hair. She said, "And now I need five liters of mouthwash."

"I don't see any in here," Jonah said.

"Oh, it's in here. There's tons of stuff hidden in here." She went to a compartment under the counter. She stood up with two condoms in her one hand and a tiny mouthwash in her other. She put the condoms down on the counter and then used the mouthwash.

"That sink is really unpleasant to look at," Jonah said. He ran the water as hard as it could go. "You grabbed the condoms."

"I did," Amy said. "I was actually pleased to hear you had a little crush on me. Not that I hadn't already figured it out."

"But you're married," Jonah said. He was possibly blushing and maybe sounded way too hopeful.

"Nope," Amy said. "Adam moved out and we've been legally separated since, uh, the day before you started. So that was extra nice of you to try to cheer me up on that first day. I've been lying, a little, whenever it comes up. I don't want to deal with everyone here knowing, I can't take all the sympathetic looks --"

"It's awful when people care about you," Jonah said.

"Here? It is." Amy smiled at him "You really have a crush on me?"

"Now that you're not married, yes, absolutely, I do."

She reached out and grabbed his belt, pulling her to him. She was backed up against the counter. He said, "That can't be comfortable."

"Well," she said. She pulled down her jeans and underwear to her ankles and then off completely and hopped up on the counter. She spread her legs.

"Wow," Jonah said. He sank down to his knees and held her thighs. He said, "You should tell me what you like."

She sighed happily and guided him closer. He figured out what she wanted and what worked for her by the way her hand loosened and tightened on his head. Before he expected it, her legs were trembling and she came. She was loud, too, and she moaned a lot. It was amazingly hot.

He stood up, one hand still between her legs, in the wet and warmth. He said, "Any mouthwash left?"

"Yes," Amy said and handed it to him. It was very very pepperminty.

She undid his jeans, enough to get his dick out. She put the condom on and kissed him. "That mouthwash is really strong," Amy said. "You can fuck me now."

"Oh, yeah," Jonah said. He took a little time teasing her before pushing in. Then he closed his eyes because she was so tight and she made this insanely arousing whimper of pleasure.

He was loud, too. He felt proud that she came again before he did. When they were done, he rested his head on her shoulder, kissing her neck. "Amy," he said.

She wrapped her arms around him and he felt he could float. He stepped away to get rid of the condom and looked for something to clean up with. Amy got down from the counter and started pulling her jeans up.

Naturally, someone knocked on the door and walked right in. "Ookay, who's having sex in here? We heard you!" Cheyenne giggled.

Jonah tried to get his pants up and ducked into a stall, dragging Amy with him. "Was that you, Amy?" Cheyenne sounded troubled. "Did Adam get in? How did he get in when we can't get out?"

Amy rolled her eyes. "Adam and I are separated. Since before Mateo and Jonah started."

"Oh, wow," Cheyenne said. "I'm sorry, Amy, that must be hard."

"Yeah, sorry I didn't tell you," Amy said.

"But I guess you're getting it on now, how was it?"

Jonah looked at her, gesturing that she better say something. Hopefully positive. Amy finally said, "It was good, can we not talk about this?"

Garrett said, "Why can't we talk about it? You two were really loud and I'd like to know that it was satisfying for both of you."

"Totally satisfying," Amy said. "Are we done with this conversation?"

"Never," Garrett said. "But I'm taking Cheyenne and we're going to repeat this story to every single person locked in this store."

"Sorry," Jonah said. "I know you wanted to keep it quiet."

"But not because of you," Amy said. "it's the divorce thing. Maybe everyone will dwell on the sex more than the divorce."

"It's more salacious, certainly," Jonah said. "Hey, um, we can have sex again, if you want. Or I don't know what your midterm is on, but maybe I could help you study?"

Amy smiled at him.

 

4\. 

Amy drove to Jonah's apartment and forced herself to knock on his door. He opened the door very quickly. She said, "Hey, Jonah. So. I have a, I wanted to make you an offer."

Jonah looked confused but he opened the door and let her in. "One I can't refuse?"

"You can totally refuse. You so can," Amy said. "Remember last week how I didn't get my weekend alone with french bread pizzas and Freddy Prinze, Jr? And you said, Hey, Amy, why don't you just reschedule, I bet Adam would be totally fine with that? Fun story, he really wasn't. It was so exactly what I expected and incredibly disappointing."

"I'm sorry, that sucks. Why couldn't he just take care of Emma for two days or take her somewhere?" Jonah was fidgeting. He was one giant fidget.

"Because he's spoiled, because I've always done everything for him and he thinks that's just the way it is, and honestly, I just, you know, I was 19 and I didn't know how to be a wife or a partner. But anyway, I just set it up on my own. I packed my bag and told him this morning I'm off," Amy said. It sounded almost jaunty when she said it. Not like she felt her whole life falling apart.

"Does he think you're coming back? Are you coming back?" More fidgets.

Amy said, "I don't know. But I do know I have a reservation at the Moonrise Hotel. For tonight and tomorrow night. And I thought you might enjoy coming. And paying."

"Oh," Jonah said. "You want me there. Or you need me to pay?"

"Why can't it be both?" Amy sighed and sat down on Jonah's couch. "You don't have to, no pressure."

Jonah sat down next to her. "What are you intentions here? I don't mean to sound, okay, that sounded silly. But what do you want here?"

Amy took a deep shaky breath. She said, "I want my two days. I want them in a fancy ass hotel. And since you actually felt bad for me and wanted me to have my two days I want them with you." She looked earnestly at the floor. This was a hardwood floor with some throw rugs. She said, "Plus sex. I would really love to have sex. But not so much with Adam."

"Huh," Jonah said. "Look, we're going to have to alternate. Here's my deal: you choose a movie, I choose a movie. And I won't complain about your choice and you only get to make two complaints about mine." He put his hand on her knee. "Exactly how expensive is Moonrise?"

"The room they had available when I called last night was, um, $400 a night. I put down $100, so if you could cover the rest. That would be great."

Jonah coughed. "Okay. I can do that. It's kind of like an indecent proposal in reverse, because I'm paying and you did the proposing, and then I, uh, spend time with you."

"You mean basically I'm sort of a whore, because you're paying to have sex with me," Amy said. "Maybe that's true."

"It's not true, I'm not paying for you for sex. I'm paying the hotel --"

"Our meals, too, they have a restaurant there and it's supposed to be good --"

Jonah patted her knee. He said, "I'm paying the hotel and the restaurant, but I'm not paying you."

"Okay, good, check in is coming up, let's pack your bag and get over there!"

The Moonrise was amazing. They had a suite and all Amy wanted to do was hang out and never have to clean anything or change the bedding. Jonah sat down next to Amy on the couch. "This is pretty cool."

"Only $400 a night," Amy said. "Okay, I choose the first movie. And I think you know what it's going to be!"

"Sin Hombre?"

"No," Amy said. "She's All That, she is all that."

"I know we just ate, but did you want to check if room service has french bread pizzas?" Jonah relaxed into the couch. Amy really liked this couch.

"I'm good," Amy said.

A half hour into the movie, Adam called. Amy gritted her teeth and answered. "So where are you?"

"I'm in a hotel, watching a movie," Amy said.

"Are you alone?"

Amy leaned further back and put her hand on the back of Jonah's neck. He was studiously not looking at her. She said, "Of course I'm alone."

"Are you coming back?"

"Because you care so much," Amy said. "You go off whenever you want and leave all the responsibilities to me and the one time I try to do it, you freak out."

"That's not fair," Adam said. "It's not fair for you to say that. I take on a lot of responsibility. I have taken on a lot. I wanted to go to college, too, you know."

"Whatever, I don't want to have this fight," Amy said. "I'm coming back. We can talk after that. Tell Emma I love her." She hung up.

Jonah didn't say anything and she didn't move her hand.

Somewhere in the middle of the movie, Amy was over the phone call and actually enjoying the movie and her beautiful hotel suite. She leaned even closer to Jonah and kissed him. He kissed her back, his hands on her shoulders and in her hair. She ran her hands through his hair, he had really nice hair, and she said, "Let's have sex."

"Couch or bed?"

"Oh, wow, we have a huge bed. Let's do it on top of the covers, though, or a big hotel towel, something so we have pristine sheets to sleep in." Amy kissed him again, his lips were soft and she wondered if he used lip balm. She said, "I have condoms. In my bag. Not intentionally. Garrett keeps giving me condoms, he thinks I need to get laid."

"That's nice?" Jonah was digging in her bag, and Amy spread a big towel on the bed.

She stripped, forgetting to be seductive about it. She said, "I haven't had sex in a while."

"I have, so I can guide you," Jonah said.

He was so nice. He spent a lot of time touching her, his mouth wet on her breasts and between her legs. Adam never spent this much time getting her ready. Jonah was on top and once Amy put the condom on him, he was almost looming over her. Except he was a skinny guy, a lean guy and it wasn't anything like when Adam was on top. She spread her legs and then crossed them around his thighs. For a minute she felt fat, her legs so much bigger than his. It wasn't easy for her as he was working his way inside her. She was so ready for this but it really had been a while. She was about to make a joke about cobwebs in her pussy, but Jonah said, "You're so beautiful."

It got better just like that and Jonah had this great rhythm, who knew, because he wasn't a great dancer at all. She managed to come first, helped by her own hand. Jonah said, "That's so hot." Adam got annoyed when she did that. Then Jonah came and they cleaned up and Amy paused in the bathroom. 

"This is a bathtub. This is a great bathtub."

"You want to get in there? I'm actually thinking of watching Maria Full Of Grace, have you seen it?"

"No," Amy said, with a laugh. She was already running the water. "You have fun."

"I'll narrate for you," Jonah said.

"I can't wait," Amy said. The tub was full enough, she could hold her breath and go underwater. When she came up for air, the movie was on.

Amy said, "I guess the lead actress is hot?"

"Absolutely," Jonah said. "I've seen it before. I did this thing in college where I tried to watch all the Oscar winning movies from every year I was alive. I haven't kept up in the last few years."

"You're so hot," Amy said. She finally dragged herself out of the tub and wrapped a big towel around her. Then she left the towel on the bed. "We should have more sex."

"I'm up for it," Jonah said. "Not literally, but I will be soon enough."

"Just don't leave any marks or anything," Amy said.

"Scratch away on me," Jonah said.

Amy woke up in a millisecond of terror, someone was in bed with her and it wasn't Adam. Then she remembered. Jonah was turned away from her, sleeping on his stomach, one leg bent. He had a really cute butt. She pulled down the sheet and reached for his butt.

"Amy, it's 4 am," Jonah murmured. "Neither of us need to be up."

"It's awesome, isn't it? We should have sex now and go back to sleep and wake up whenever we want," she said.

Jonah was silent for a moment, then he said, "I can get behind that plan." He got up and used the bathroom and she followed him. Then they were back under the soft sheets and she could not believe that he kept making her come over and over again.

She woke up again and it was nearly 9. She stretched and wiggled. It had been an incredibly long time since Amy had had sex three times in 12 hours. She thought about all those dumb jokes people made about not being able to walk. She could definitely walk. She just needed a few hours break from the great sex. She looked at Jonah sleeping and his messed up hair and felt love like a lump in her throat.

It was such a great two days. Jonah was such great company. He spent a lot, which made her feel bad.

She would have been worried about being caught but it had been forever since she and Adam had been intimate. Since they'd even be close. She sighed. She was driving home and all she wanted to do was turn around and sleep at Jonah's forever.

But there was Emma, so she kept driving.

 

5\. 

Amy and Jonah watched Glenn leave. Amy suddenly said, "Speaking of no options."

"Like me," Jonah said.

"You don't really have no options."

"I have some money, sure," Jonah said.

"And you could apply for jobs with your college degree and whatever else you did since business school," Amy said.

"I majored in Sociology, I have no real world skills," Jonah said. "And yes, my parents paid for my college so I don't have student loans from there, and they covered my expenses for a few years after that, but since I hadn't accomplished anything in my life, they told me I had to take out loans for business school. They only paid half. So I owe a lot of money. I basically have my Cloud 9 salary and one credit card that my parents pay the bill for. I pay rent and car insurance and food and my loan."

"So you don't pay for your car," Amy said.

"My parents bought it for me," Jonah said.

"We were never in the same boat," Amy said. "I am, I'm sorry. I apologize."

"Oh, I should apologize," Jonah said.

Amy said, "Nope, we're good. I've been lying to you, by the way. Lie by omission."

Jonah looked at her. Amy said, "Adam and I decided to get a divorce yesterday. He's moving in with his parents tonight." She took out a little airplane sized bottle of something from her coat. "Want some?"

"Sure." He drank the whole bottle. "I have a credit card, you know. I'll get you another one."

"I stole that," Amy said, giggling. "Which one of us should go back inside and buy more booze? Since we're out here drinking, apparently."

"Drinking is good," Jonah said, standing up. "I have a credit card."

When he got back, Amy said, "No comment on the divorce news?"

"I'm really sorry. I know that must suck for you," Jonah said. "You seemed to be in a pretty good mood all day, I never would have suspected."

"I was covering, at first. But then your friend had that video and I was just happy. I mean, I'm sure I'll be really upset later, but right now, with this amount of alcohol in me, I'm okay."

"That's good. How do you think you'll feel with this?" He pulled two bottles out of his bag. 

"You like rum and coke," Amy said. "Okay, works for me."

They had enough to drink, the first time in a long time Jonah had let himself get really wasted. Jonah kept smiling at Amy. He would reach out and play with her hair and she would laugh. She tried to get him to dance and he refused. For a little while.

They almost kissed three times. But they didn't. He stumbled into her lap and she actually spanked him a few times. "Not my kink," he said.

"Funny," she said, her hand suddenly on his dick through his pants. "You seem to like it."

He rolled off her and sat on the parking lot ground. "I like you." Jonah had called an Uber ten minutes ago and he kept hoping it would show up and deliver him before he really embarrassed himself. Which had probably already happened. 

The Uber finally came. The guy was taking them to his apartment. "Amy," Jonah said, "I'll pay for it to take you home."

"I can sleep it off at your apartment," she said. She leaned into him and grabbed at his dick again. "You just like me."

"I don't mean, I'm not objecting, but I really want you to know, I'm not currently at, uh, full like. Okay?"

"Got it, you don't have a --" she whispered -- "small penis."

"You whisper that but you haven't taken your hand off my crotch since we got in the car," Jonah said.

"I bet you've seen worse," Amy said to the Uber driver.

The driver nodded. They were at Jonah's apartment so Amy actually let go of his penis. He took her hand and pulled her into his place. Then he poured them both large glasses of water. "Drink all of this," he said.

"I know," Amy said.

He handed over two pieces of bread. It was Dave's Killer Bread, by far Jonah's favorite if he wasn't buying at the farmer's market. "Tell me when you're about to throw up."

Amy said, "Why do you think I'm about to throw up?"

"Last time I saw you this drunk, you threw up a lot," Jonah said. "And you said that thing about how I was the last person you should be talking to about whatever and I never found out what you meant."

"I meant that I feel like I regret my lack of sex, like Adam was the fifth guy I did it with, but no one since. And I didn't want to tell you because I knew you wanted to have sex with me," Amy said. She'd taken off her shoes and socks and coat and now she was lurching up from his couch to his bedroom.

"You wanted to have sex with me," Jonah said. He followed her into his own bedroom. She was looking through his drawers. "What are you doing? You're violating my privacy. Not as much as when you kept grabbing my dick. But still."

"I'm looking for clothes to sleep in," Amy said. "Tomorrow, when we wake up, if we're not super hungover, I think we should do more than grab your dick."

"I would like that," Jonah said. He grabbed her by the hips and guided her to his bed. Then he found a pair of basketball shorts that his brother had sent as a gift. Because all Jonah really wanted was Oklahoma Thunder gear. Because Missouri and Oklahoma were basically the same state. He threw the shorts at Amy. She got off the bed and took off her pants, leaving them on the floor. Her underwear was black with tiny stars all over. He basically stared at her until she pulled up the shorts.

"I want the bathroom now," Amy said.

"To throw up?"

"No," Amy said. He heard her throwing up. He decided not to comment.

Jonah woke up and his head ached. It wasn't too bad, he'd had much worse, but it wasn't really great. He got up off his couch and went into the bedroom to find Amy. She was still asleep, actually curled up like a little bean. Which felt kinda racist as Jonah thought it.

By the time Amy woke up, Jonah had showered and gotten day off dressed, made toast and left and came back from McDonalds with breakfast food in case that was Amy's brand of hangover cure.

Amy walked into the living room slash kitchen area, squinting, and said, "Oh, God, I'm getting divorced."

"I'm sorry," Jonah said. "Maybe I shouldn't have been nearly making out with you so much last night."

"Please, I was totally the aggressor," Amy said. She sat down across from him at the kitchen table and grabbed her McDonalds bag. "Did you make coffee yet?"

"There's a great coffee shop two houses over, I was gonna wait until you were up and I could order exactly what you wanted," Jonah said, standing up.

"Get me coffee now. A latte. Regular milk, none of that almond soy coconut crap. Maybe an extra shot. Make it big. Maybe get two," Amy said. "Be back soon."

Jonah came back with four, one for him and three for Amy. She'd eaten everything from McDonalds and all the toast. Jonah waited for Amy to finish her first latte before he started talking. Then he said, "I am sorry about the divorce thing. Did you tell Emma yet?"

"Yup," Amy said. "She was very angry. And then she decided she was staying with my parents for the week and Adam and I said that was okay. Gives him time to move out." She rubbed at her face. "I think we should still have sex."

"Really?"

"Really," Amy said. "I mean, you know, cold light of day and all that, but in the cold sober light of day, I really want to have sex with you. Unless you don't want to."

"Wow," Jonah said. "Honestly, I, huh. Thinking about that, and why am I thinking about that? Of course I want to have sex with you."

It was really another hour until Amy had showered and they'd both brushed their teeth and Jonah had watched an episode of Hotel Beau Sejour. Then Amy sat down next to him and said, "Sex time?"

"With such a sexy ask, how can I resist?" He smiled. "I'm a little nervous, though."

"Here's an idea: turn off your weird subtitled show, come into the bedroom with me and make out a lot."

"I love that idea," Jonah said.

It was a really good idea. Amy's nearly naked body was a wonder to behold and touch and she was a great kisser. She really loved grabbing his ass and he loved her for it.

Amy pulled off his underwear and rather gently held his penis. She said, "Is this full like? Just to reassure you, not small. Above average even."

"Thank you? Thank you," Jonah said. "But we need a condom right? I prefer to use one for both of us."

"Okay," she said, letting go.

Once the condom was on, Amy pushed him on his back and lowered herself on his dick. It was fantastic, amazing, all sorts of transcendental raw sweaty beauty. They very nearly came at the same time.

"So," he said. They had both cleaned up and Amy was pulling on her jeans. "That was good, right?"

"It was absolutely good," Amy said. "No, it was great. I mean, long time since I've had sex and even longer since it was someone who wasn't Adam, but it was great. I'm glad we did it."

"Do you think we'll do it again?" Jonah was convinced he sounded pathetic. He was sure he sounded pathetic. He should have been more understanding, she'd just gotten divorced, not even legally divorced, just getting ready to do it legally.

"Yes," Amy said. She smiled at him. "I swear. Just give me a few hours to freak out and I'll be texting you."

"Awesome," Jonah said. "Freak out as much as you need."

"Thanks," Amy said. She did kiss him before she left.

 

!!

Amy let Jonah pull out the chair for her at the restaurant he'd chosen. She didn't want to think about how much effort had probably gone into picking this particular restaurant. She wondered how many Yelp reviews Jonah had read. Her mind was starting to whir around to distract her. They were on a first date. First actual date. Not the first kiss, or second kiss, or first hot make out in Jonah's car, or the time they almost had sex in the break room. Here was an actual date.

Jonah said, "Order whatever you want. No limits."

"Okay," Amy said. "Why is this so awkward? I mean, I was just thinking, we've almost had sex and yet sitting at this nice probably really highly rated on Yelp restaurant. And it feels sort of awkward."

"Because it's a date. It's codifying the relationship," Jonah said.

"As opposed to getting to third base in your car in the parking lot of Cloud 9," Amy said. "But I guess you're right."

"Was that third base? I thought blowjobs were second base," Jonah said right at the waitress walked up.

They both ordered and then Amy said, "Basically third base is nearly everything but, which is not anal, because that's like an in the park homerun."

"I've never been into baseball," Jonah said. "Which is funny, because I'm from Chevy Chase and we kind of have two baseball teams."

"Not the actor," Amy said. 

"No, not the actor. It's a suburb of DC in Maryland," Jonah said. "So we always had the Orioles and then when I got older, the Nationals in DC. But I liked the Bullets even if they now have a different name."

"Bullets is not a good team name," Amy said. "Wizards is sort of weird. I really wasn't into sports but then my brother played baseball in high school so I learned more and the Cardinals are generally pretty good."

Jonah nodded. "So you think of anal as an in the field home run?"

"In the park home run. Obviously home base is always sex, penis in vagina, which is, I don't know, weird for kids who aren't straight. But in the park home run, that's some hard work," Amy said. "Oh, God, why are we talking about anal?"

"Because for some reason this is awkward," Jonah said. "I like anal. I feel like we're sort of the anal generation thanks to porn, you know? So much porn, so easily available."

Amy stared at her plate. "That's good to know. I've never done that."

"Nor do you have to, ever," Jonah said. "I haven't done it that much."

"I'm going to go with good to know, again. So let's move away from baseball or anal sex," Amy said. "New topic. Personal growth? Do you want to talk about that?"

"Sure, sure, good choice," Jonah said. "I think I've had a lot in these last six months, not as much as you. But confronting demons and skeletons in the closet."

"You've been dating, not pining, good for you," Amy said. 

"Sorry about that," Jonah said. "Not as sorry as I am because of that thing where I was still in love with you. Sorry to her. But I've made my apologies, so. But your personal growth, that's impressive."

Amy looked at her nails. She'd gone to Cheyenne's nail place and now she had bright pink nails with polka dots that glowed in the dark. She said, "How about work? Um, politics?"

Jonah smiled at her. He reached across the table and took her hand. "Hey, Amy. We don't have to do this."

"No, I want to do this. And how else would I have known you like anal?" She laughed a little. 

They relaxed after that, and the food finally came. Jonah pulled out her chair when it was time to leave, too. She got in his car. She had two glasses of wine so she said, "So you like anal?"

"I'm really embarrassed I said that," Jonah said. "I've, uh, actually, done that both ways. I mean, college, and when I was interning in New York City."

"Oh," Amy said. "Oh." She took way too long to process that. "Oh, you've had sex with men."

"Not a lot, I mean, it's been years," Jonah said. "I was going to make sure to tell you before we talked about anal for the whole date, you know, before we first had serious sex, not in a break room or a car. I have a very clean bill of health, but I really love you."

"Okay," Amy said. "You didn't have to tell me. I care about the clean bill of health, but I don't care about all the people you've had sex with before. Also, you can't say I love you any more until I say it."

"That's mean," Jonah said. When she looked at him, he was smiling. "I didn't mean to put any pressure on you."

"No, I'm good," Amy said. "We're good. We're going to your new place, right?"

"Since you want to, we definitely are." 

Jonah now had a good sized studio apartment in an expensive area. She noticed he still had the Putin painting up. "Doesn't that wig you out? I mean, nowadays."

"There isn't much that doesn't wig me out these days," Jonah said. "So what, what did you want to do now?"

"You mentioned something about serious sex?" She got up close to him and pushed off his blazer. He had such nice suits. 

"I did," Jonah said. He reached down and hiked up her dress so he could have his hands on her butt. Jonah loved her butt. 

"Don't worry," Jonah said. "My penis will only go in your vagina."

Amy laughed. "Well, thank goodness."


End file.
